What A Successful Alcohol-Free Life Relies On

I used to think that quitting drinking would solve all of my problems. That all of the painful stuff that was going on inside of me would suddenly resolve itself if I could just get alcohol out of my life. Turns out that was only partially true.

As I started to experiment with sobriety, and when I finally let go of alcohol in 2020, what I learned is that my toxic relationship with alcohol was a symptom of me not being able to tap into my intuitive self. I was so disconnected from her. And alcohol was pushing us further apart. 

I realized that by removing the alcohol I was enabling myself to start doing the work that would bring me back to my intuitive self. To find true success in my alcohol-free life, and to reconnect with the woman I knew that I was, I’d have to rediscover my inner integrity.

(Note: What I tell my clients is that removing alcohol is about 10% of the work and the other 90% is emotional sobriety.) 

But how?

I’m here to tell you that it turns out that what I needed to do was to start developing a continuous practice of boundary setting. And this is what the women that I work with need, to. It all comes back to boundaries.

Looking back, there were so many times when I was drinking when I just completely ignored boundaries that I had set for myself. You could picture my boundaries as a short picket fence that only went along the front of the house and that was starting to fall over after a lot of wear and tear. This continuous practice of boundary breaking was not only depleting my integrity, but it was chipping away at my self-worth.

Integrity is not just about keeping promises to others—it’s about keeping promises to ourselves. This is where the “inner” part comes in. When we honor our own commitments, we strengthen the foundation of our self-worth and pave the way for meaningful change.

To build inner integrity, you need boundaries. Saying “yes” to what aligns with your goals and “no” to what doesn’t. Boundaries protect your energy, your focus, and your growth. When you respect your own boundaries, you send a powerful message to yourself: My goals and well-being matter. 

When I stopped letting alcohol keep me from this work, I knew it was time that I replaced the picket fence with something more formidable. Something that would protect me and my integrity against the elements. 

So that’s what I did. It took time, but I started rebuilding my boundary fence day-by-day, picket-by-picket. Now it is tall and strong and protects me. And I care for it.

If I tell my friend I am going to meet her for a run at 6am, rain or shine I’ll be there. If I make a plan to clean the house on Friday afternoon so I can enjoy a relaxing evening on the couch with my husband, a cheesy movie, and a cozy NA drink, I’m doing it. And if I say I am going to stick to my protein plan for the week, I’m finding what works for me and I’m giving it my best shot.

Today I am proud that I say what I mean and I mean what I say. 

And this is part of what I teach in my coaching. You will learn how to move past the symptom, what you need to do to start setting boundaries and how to protect them. 

And what I love the most about getting to work with women that are ready to move beyond alcohol, women like you, is that through this process you will learn how to leverage your purpose and power to step into the woman that you are meant to become.

Learn more about Feel Good AF, my 13-Week Group Program at the button below.

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